Introducing ‘Afternoon Raccoon’

As you will see I am continually amazed by how absurd this world and life can be.  The search for explanation and purpose is a grueling one and I am skeptical as to whether answers will ever be revealed.  While we wait, we should have a little fun, right?  In a moment of what I call, accidental brilliance, I created a character known as the, ‘Afternoon Raccoon’.  Now most raccoons found awake during the day are feared to be rabid, which is where our character derives his name.  You may now refer to him as Rabid the Afternoon Raccoon.  One day Rabid is simply unable to fall asleep before sunrise, maybe its his racing mind or maybe its the coffee he drank too much of the night before.  Our character is now forced to adjust to this new, unfamiliar existence.  Finding food in the trash of others was once a simple task under the night sky.  But now our hero must relearn his craft and fine tune his ability to live off the waste of others.  In addition, he will be forced to assimilate and appear to be a normal member of society, not a rabid beast.  On a normal sunny day, Rabid is perusing the dumpsters of nearby restaurants, when he is greeted by a vulture, who we will call Turk.  Rabid explains his bizarre and heartbreaking story to Turk, hoping for some kind of guidance.  Turk agrees to take him under his wing, no pun intended, and help him through this difficult time.  His first suggestion is rather comical, “Turk tosses Rabid a plastic bottle”.  ”Whats this?” Rabid replies.  ”Its like moonblock, only you use it during the day” Turk says.  There of course is more to come…